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GLOBAL IUP WIRE SERVICE
GLOBAL IUP WIRE SERVICE
SACRAMENTO, CA
The California Attorney General's Office today renewed demands with the State Department and the Federal Internal Revenue Service to increase diplomatic pressure at the French Foreign Ministry for the extradition of failed Presidential hopeful, Buck Stratton. Stratton has been convicted in absentia of tax fraud, tax evasion, mail fraud and numerous SEC violations. Two of Stratton's aides, Ted Harper and Andrew Rosenthal have been granted full immunity after a Federal Jury determined that they had been forced to assist in the crimes. Citing fear for their personal safety in the face of extortion by the often violent Pastor, both have agreed to testify for the prosecution in the continuing investigation. Buck Stratton is claimed to owe in excess of $500 million in taxes and penalties.
LOS ANGELES, CA.
PEOPLE IN THE NEWS
One time protege to Pastor Buck Stratton of the now defunct Buck Stratton Radio Ministries, Lolly Harshaw announced today that she has written a book revealing her own story during her time with the notorious Pastor. A cocktail waitress in Randy Brandy's Hollywood Western Grill, she told reporters, "Yeah, I tell stories after a couple of drinks."
TAMPA, FL.
Ruth Yemmer, Great Mother and First Oracle of the United Christians for Christ Church was buried today in the Freedom Memorial next to woman's author Xanatu Pushbellows. Pushbellows was given honorary Oracle status posthumously at the quiet service.
MILWAUKEE, WI
Ex-President Robert Haskill announced that he has accepted an honorary board membership with the Barkers and Mewers Pet Food Corporation of Milwaukee. The company produces pet food and pet products. Haskill indicated that he has abandoned plans for the Robert Haskill Memorial Library due to funding problems.
WASHINGTON, D.C.
Construction of the Jesus Memorial near the Lincoln Monument will be completed within the month. Slightly smaller than the Lincoln Monument, the Memorial is constructed of rare blue marble from Ethiopia and boasts a transparent dome made of quartz crystals. The visual effect of the tomb is already apparent. The interior is lit by sunlight through the dome during the day and by an eternal flame during darkness. The body of Jesus Robeles is being held in the UCFC Cathedral in Washington. No specific plans have been made for the interment.
UNITED NATIONS, NY
Reassurances from other countries that the message of Jesus was heard in all areas have done little to calm the normally suspicious PRC. After threatening war following accusations that U.S. satellites had beamed mind control messages into the People's Republic of China that government has remained uncharacteristically silent. Experts on China policy suggest that the saber rattling may have opened opportunities for the democratic movement to take control of the State Council.
WASHINGTON, DC
President Martha Stratton commented with some satisfaction today that the general economy is in a period of unparalleled sustained growth. Citing figures for improvements in living standards and health for the nation's poorest citizens, she told reporters, "I remember what Jesus said to me. I expect everyone else to do their best to remember what He said to them. As for improvements in living standards, I've got a bunch of little projects I plan to work on."
PARANEHO PRIMOS NORTE, VA
Retired Marine General Justus Tower announced that the famous ranch once owned by Jesus Robeles has been given to him by Robeles' widow to be made into a home for delinquent boys. General Tower will be assisted by his newly wed wife, Beth Ramsey Tower and the sole Secret Service Agent who remained on duty during the Haskill fiasco, Frank Barnes. Barnes and his wife Doris will teach high school classes at the facility. Barnes daughter, Allissa, who was saved by Jesus Robeles attends a prep school in Atlanta.
PARANEHO, AMAPA, BRAZIL
Jesus' widow, Hieress Brenda Teal-Robeles has taken her son, Justus Robeles, planning a return to Paraneho in a move that puzzles some celebrity watchers. The family will be accompanied by long time friend Juan Gemarro, his wife Nicole and their young twins, Bolivar and Juanita. Her yacht, The Resurrection, is expected to make the trip in about a week.
The tiny island offers only primitive living conditions. It is protected by a small but potent private Navy owned by the Robeles family.
