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GLOBAL IUP NEWS SERVICE
GLOBAL IUP NEWS SERVICE
RIO DE JANIERO, BRAZIL Acting under a government order, elements of the Brazilian Navy have taken the man alleged to be cloned from Jesus Christ into "protective hospitality". Reports of events on the tiny island off the coat of Amapa Province indicate that the action was peaceful even though a number of armed employees of the Robeles estate were present. The identity of other persons evacuated from the island remains confused. Accompanied by his lifelong friend, Jesus was placed in a government site southwest of the city where government specialists will examine his claim to divinity.
RIO DE JANEIRO, BRAZIL A spokesman for the Brazilian Interior Ministry responded angrily today to increasing pressure from Neo-Apostolic groups in the United States that Jesus be allowed to come to that country. "Jesus is considered a national treasure by the people of Brazil. The United States has historically looted everything of a national or cultural value from the people of Brazil. If U.S. citizens want to be close to this man, let them come here to see him. Norte Americanos need to get over their habit of ordering everyone around from their military culture in the north
WASHINGTON, D.C A State Department spokesman said in a brief statement today that there was no evidence whatsoever that the Brazilian Government had any plan, present or future, for the dissection of the man Jesus as an attempt to determine his divine nature. Sources on Capitol Hill suggested that the rumor had been started by the Christians for Christ organization through television news media under its control.
LONDON, U.K. The infamous tabloid, London Examiner, today posted the headline "NAKED JESUS CAUGHT IN BACK STROKE" over a fuzzy photo taken by the US Vestal Seven class High Eye satellite on station over Rio. Brazilian Interior Ministry protested the orbital eavesdropping, calling it an obvious provocation and a prelude to a US invasion. Neither CIA nor State Department sources would speculate how the tabloid acquired the photo.
