Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Chapter 82

82
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SAN DIEGO, CA PASTOR BUCK'S WIFE SPEAKS OUT
In an unusual move today, Mrs. Martha Stratton, soon to be ex-wife of Pastor Buck Stratton of Stratton Radio Ministries spoke with reporters by phone from her home. The following statement was made under approval of her attorney in her divorce proceedings.

"I lived with that man for almost twenty years, stood by him while he was trying to build his radio ministry. I could stand the drinking and the crooked books, that was pretty normal for someone like him. But when it came to Lolly Harshaw. Never. I wouldn't have any man after he was soiled by that bitch. I have Biblical precedent for everything I'm doing. The Bible allows a woman to divorce a man for adultery. As far as Lolly Harshaw goes, she can have the son-of-bitch, but not the money I helped him make. I mean, we struggled right up until they found the tomb. He capitalized on every part of the Blessed Second Coming in a negative, sinful way.

"When this started he was a drunken third rate preacher on two small radio stations six hours a week. Buck Stratton Ministries was and still is the trailer park of radio preaching, and Buck Stratton is the biggest pig at the trough of trailer trash evangelism.

"He's made two hundred million dollars since they found the tomb. You're damn right I want half." Martha Stratton.

SAN DIEGO, CA PASTOR STRATTON EXPLAINS DIVORCE
Pastor Buck Stratton, head of the Stratton Radio Ministries, today released his first public statement after his separation from his wife of twenty-seven years, Martha Stratton.

"I live my life under the burden of the Holy Scriptures. When Martha married me she was like a lot of other women of that day and age who had more or less run loose all their lives. The scripture tells me that a wife is to submit to her husband in all things. That also tells me that it is the husband's job to teach his wife that submission, to train her to become a good work mate and to lead a pious life."

"A spirit of evil entered Martha. She wouldn't submit to me. She became defiant. She became lazy and dirty. She rarely prepared meals for me -- fit meals, that is. I could no longer in good conscience be spiritually responsible for her salvation through my personal family leadership. Martha has become quite erratic. I am not entirely confident that she even knows what she is doing."

LOS ANGELES, CA District Court Judge Harry Fromm today dismissed Mrs. Martha Stratton's $118,000,000 property settlement petition against her ex-husband Pastor Buck Stratton of Buck Stratton Radio Ministries. In his ruling, Judge Fromm, cited her unsubstantiated claim of infidelity against her husband as a sign of mean-spirited vengeance and money grabbing. The Judge went on to say publicly that the assets of Stratton Ministries are meant to be dedicated to higher purposes than supporting this fallen woman's extravagant new friends and habits.

The settlement offer made by Pastor Stratton included Martha's 2002 Buick Century and $800 per month support until such time as she might remarry.

Mrs. Stratton's attorneys have moved for a change of venue and have filed an appeal with the Appellate Court in California after Fromm dismissed a mistrial motion.

LOS ANGELES, CA
A three judge panel in Appellate Court today overturned a lower court's ruling in the property settlement phase of Martha Stratton's divorce trial. The judges ruled that lower court judge, Harry Fromm, should have recused himself from the initial proceedings. Judge Fromm bears the Mark of God and has contributed heavily to the Buck Stratton Radio Ministries in the past. The Appeals Court ruled 2 to 1 that venue criteria for the case should include selection of a jurist without affiliation to either Fundamentalist or Neo-Apostolic groups. The dissenting judge on the Appeals panel argued that Martha Stratton had gone against the Laws of God and should take what had been offered her.

LOS ANGELES, CA DIVORCE SQUABBLE LEADS TO INCREASED VIOLENCE
FBI statistics on crime nationwide show an increase in street violence in most cities. The increased levels of violence have precipitated higher numbers of fatalities and serious injuries. Nationwide the number of arrests for hooliganism, failing to obey a peace officer and vandalism have increased to the highest level since the beginning of the crisis. Due to crowded conditions in all jails, many felony arrests have resulted only in a citation and a promise to appear in court to face charges. Prosecutors are generally believed to be four to five months behind handling the current cases.

One notable exception is Orange County's experimental detention camp. Currently holding almost 20,000 detainees in primitive conditions while they await trial, the facility is being enlarged to twice its present size. Face with fighting inside the camp between the factions, officials have used fire hoses to maintain order. Current plans are to have separate camps for each group. Serious crimes not associated with the crisis are down sharply.

LOS ANGELES, CA
Pastor Buck Stratton took off the gloves today in the growing battle with his ex-wife Martha, calling her the 'whore of the anti-Christ'. In a message recorded earlier and broadcast at the gathering, estimated in excess of 80,000 of the faithful, Stratton called for a fight to the death in the California court deciding the final settlement terms for the divorce. Stratton appeared briefly on the podium after his message with Lolly Harshaw, 38, his aide and administrative assistant. Martha Stratton claims in court documents that Harshaw, now his constant companion, was the cause of the separation.

LOS ANGELES, CA Still awaiting the decision on her divorce settlement, Martha Stratton soon to be ex-wife of Minister Buck Stratton, was dealt a defeat in a California Superior Court in a bid to obtain a restraining order to prevent the California Minister from calling her the 'whore of the anti-Christ'. The Court ruled that Stratton's depiction of his ex-wife was protected speech under the First Amendment of the Constitution. Asked to comment, Martha Stratton said "If you want to talk to the real whore of the anti-Christ, I'll give you Lolly Harshaw's phone number. She used to be just a whore. Then the little trollop became a home wrecker. Since then she wound up with Buck Stratton, I guess you could call her a 'home wrecking whore of the anti-Christ'. She's made it big for a slut."

LOS ANGELES, CA
With a decision expected sometime soon, the California Superior Court hearing the Stratton divorce trial was again the scene of violent protests today. Fundamentalists demonstrators clashed with Neo-Apostolic Christians for Christ in large numbers. At stake is an estimated $100,000,000 claimed in the divorce settlement by Martha Stratton. Stratton Ministries has maintained that the money is legitimately revenue to the Buck Stratton Church and cannot be included in the settlement.

Police estimate that the crowd, many of whom are armed, at approximately 200,000 total. Police spokesmen told reporters that the crowd is essentially evenly distributed between Neo-Apostolics and Fundamentalists. Eleven people have been shot and scores have been transported to area hospitals, over four thousand have been arrested. Certain medical facilities are refusing to accept Neo-Apostolics for treatment forcing authorities to transport them out of Los Angeles.

BALTIMORE, MD
A wealthy Maryland man who wishes to remain anonymous announced through his attorney today that he would personally match every dollar in excess of one hundred million that Martha Stratton's lawyers could "strip out of Buck Stratton's hide." Mrs. Stratton's settlement demand is for one hundred million dollars.

Her attorneys in Los Angeles, when asked to comment, responded "When you're going against Buck Stratton, there is no possible greater incentive needed to win. We appreciate the gentleman's moral support, but Stratton motivates me everytime I see him. I'd take that slime-ball's shoes away from him if I could get 'em."

LOS ANGELES, CA
After conferring with attorneys from Stratton Ministries, Lolly Harshaw, Buck Stratton's Administrative Assistant, was allowed to answer a single question from reporters. Asked about Mrs. Stratton, Harshaw said "She should lose some weight. I think she is a mean person."